As long as they do eventually get married it is fine. It would probably work out okay. They took care of their responsibility eventually.
Well, at least they got married eventually! Yeah, I know that is not ideal the way they did it. But the fact of the matter is, they made it work, and ultimately it worked out okay.
They got pregnant first, then decided to get married. At least they made the commitment eventually. And it seems as though they kind of knew they would be together permanently. So it's like they figured, "ehh what the heck we might as well make a baby now. After all what difference does it make? We are going to be together with each other anyway."
Back in high school whenever I heard of a plight of a downtrodden girl who made bad decisions, I usually had a "serves you right" attitude towards it. Well, you should have known better than to have sex and get pregnant.
But now as I look over this a little more deeply, I realize that that attitude is cruel. Somehow I doubt they were thinking about poverty and food stamps and living in the projects when they made the baby. It is not only cruel, but cruel to the extent that it is even anti-feminist.
Maybe a better approach is to be compassionate and empathetic. Isn't that what the changing meanings of some things is all about? Be more open-minded and understanding.
Look, what's done is done. It serves no realistic purpose to look at hindsight with 20/20 vision and give a condescending sniff and say "miff." This helps no one. It does not affect the observer doing the sniffing. But it does harm the girl that finds herself in a dire situation.
However, lending a compassionate hand does help the girl in the dire situation obviously helps the girl. It obviously helps the baby. And it does help the observer ultimately, for the reason that it uplifts the observer's spirits and makes this person a better human being. For the reason that they all live in the same society. Our actions affect those around us.
I gradually slowly came to this opinion. ((widows, divrced women whoe ex-husbands are deadbeat dads.)))
For the longest time, I am deeply embarrassed to admit, I had very little sympathy for a grieving widow who could not make ends meet. A woman who was not able to provide for her family, because she did not have the resources nor credentials to get a well-paying job, and therefore could not feed her kids.
For the reason that she had dedicated her entire life to being a stay-at-home mom and homemaker, someone who keeps watch over the hearth and home.
My thought process was, Well, you should have planned out your life better. Rather than relying on a man to provide for you, and then assuming that a man will always be there to provide for you, you should have taken care of yourself first. You cannot assume a man will always be your safety net, always be something solid and stalwart for you to fall back on. You unfortunately allowed yourself to be lured into a state of false security and comfort.
Now I have finally come to my senses. Or more accurately, I have come to my humanity.
How can I call myself a feminist if I have such a cruel, harsh, inhuman attitude towards women?
>> and single mothers are women who made this same thought process[[___ same mistake???
and simply did not get married beforehand. should they be so severely punished by society, by financial policy in this country, just because they did not [[[[put, find some nice way to state that they did not ___
get it in weirting,, get a contract made, have a piece of paper declaring their commitment, love, and trust to eo??
Yes, I am still deeply judgmental of unwed single mothers. I sit in harsh judgment, for they made some life-altering, severely damaging mistakes.
But to force myself to refrain from helping them is simply abusive. It is abusive, cruel, malicious. Society has already dealt, and life in general has already dealt them a horrible harsh blow.
Plus, sitting here and wallowing in the past is, simply put, useless. It does not thing but waste my own precious time, energy, and effort to sit on my derriere, fuming and resentful of them, grumbling about their past transgressions of irresponsibility. Really, what good could it possibly do to dwell and languor on the fact that they got pregnant out of wedlock? Yes, we already know it is morally reprehensible. It happened, it was in the past, get over it, move on.
But now there is a child, a human being, to take care of. We are as a conglomerate, interconnected, complex society. As such, we all have a duty to pitch in. We all have a sworn duty, incumbent upon us as human beings, to make sure the child grows up into a good, decent kind human being who actively participates and contributes to society.
It takes a village to raise a child. We are not simply "members" of this village. Monikering us "members" makes it sound as though the "village" is a disconnected entity entirely separate from ourselves. We human beings ARE the foundation, heart, and spirit, of the village. We are the village.
As people of the human race, we are a society that is connected to each other.
Another one-- they were wild, they had piercings nn crap back then. But they want to improve and mend their lives now. they have seen [[the error of their ways]]]
I have offered criticism of the recent remake movie Charlie's angels and the accompanying Beyonce song. Perhaps I was too critical of specifics and I should have focused more on the positive cultural affects. I feel I should atone for my harshness therein.
Drew Barrymore. I remember back in the 90s she was an absolute mess, with more entries on her social and personal rap sheet than a career criminal has of violence. But she has now evolved into a lovely human being, and dare I say, a notable colleague in feminism and praiseworthy professional.
I remember the first instance of when I saw a spark of humanity and decency from her. There was a PSA of sorts on TV, a very creative one. She was encouraging young women to vote. As a way of getting people's attention, obviously she didn't just do that spur-of-the-moment in real time as they were filming the commercial, she burned a bra in closing the commercial. The writers, producers, etc. had the really cool idea to hearken back to the greats, the founding mothers of this country. Chances are, Drew Barrymore herself was one of the producers of the commercial, seeing as to the fact that she was one of the producers of the recent Charlie's Angels.
Actually, no. The first time I saw drew Barrymore and was very pleasantly surprised that she had turned over a new leaf-- was the "Never Been Kissed" movie. It was adorable and cute and moral and hilarious and fun. She was innocent but intelligent, a nuance that is lost on far too many people regarding situations in real life.
So it is very possible for someone to turn their life around and make sure that right here, right now, from this moment on forward, they will make the right decisions and make a healthy life for themselves.
So instead of worrying about what they did in their past lives, how they conducted themselves in the past, let us focus on planning for the future.
Let us focus our energies on the future tense.
Well, at least they got married eventually! Yeah, I know that is not ideal the way they did it. But the fact of the matter is, they made it work, and ultimately it worked out okay.
They got pregnant first, then decided to get married. At least they made the commitment eventually. And it seems as though they kind of knew they would be together permanently. So it's like they figured, "ehh what the heck we might as well make a baby now. After all what difference does it make? We are going to be together with each other anyway."
Back in high school whenever I heard of a plight of a downtrodden girl who made bad decisions, I usually had a "serves you right" attitude towards it. Well, you should have known better than to have sex and get pregnant.
But now as I look over this a little more deeply, I realize that that attitude is cruel. Somehow I doubt they were thinking about poverty and food stamps and living in the projects when they made the baby. It is not only cruel, but cruel to the extent that it is even anti-feminist.
Maybe a better approach is to be compassionate and empathetic. Isn't that what the changing meanings of some things is all about? Be more open-minded and understanding.
Look, what's done is done. It serves no realistic purpose to look at hindsight with 20/20 vision and give a condescending sniff and say "miff." This helps no one. It does not affect the observer doing the sniffing. But it does harm the girl that finds herself in a dire situation.
However, lending a compassionate hand does help the girl in the dire situation obviously helps the girl. It obviously helps the baby. And it does help the observer ultimately, for the reason that it uplifts the observer's spirits and makes this person a better human being. For the reason that they all live in the same society. Our actions affect those around us.
I gradually slowly came to this opinion. ((widows, divrced women whoe ex-husbands are deadbeat dads.)))
For the longest time, I am deeply embarrassed to admit, I had very little sympathy for a grieving widow who could not make ends meet. A woman who was not able to provide for her family, because she did not have the resources nor credentials to get a well-paying job, and therefore could not feed her kids.
For the reason that she had dedicated her entire life to being a stay-at-home mom and homemaker, someone who keeps watch over the hearth and home.
My thought process was, Well, you should have planned out your life better. Rather than relying on a man to provide for you, and then assuming that a man will always be there to provide for you, you should have taken care of yourself first. You cannot assume a man will always be your safety net, always be something solid and stalwart for you to fall back on. You unfortunately allowed yourself to be lured into a state of false security and comfort.
Now I have finally come to my senses. Or more accurately, I have come to my humanity.
How can I call myself a feminist if I have such a cruel, harsh, inhuman attitude towards women?
>> and single mothers are women who made this same thought process[[___ same mistake???
and simply did not get married beforehand. should they be so severely punished by society, by financial policy in this country, just because they did not [[[[put, find some nice way to state that they did not ___
get it in weirting,, get a contract made, have a piece of paper declaring their commitment, love, and trust to eo??
Yes, I am still deeply judgmental of unwed single mothers. I sit in harsh judgment, for they made some life-altering, severely damaging mistakes.
But to force myself to refrain from helping them is simply abusive. It is abusive, cruel, malicious. Society has already dealt, and life in general has already dealt them a horrible harsh blow.
Plus, sitting here and wallowing in the past is, simply put, useless. It does not thing but waste my own precious time, energy, and effort to sit on my derriere, fuming and resentful of them, grumbling about their past transgressions of irresponsibility. Really, what good could it possibly do to dwell and languor on the fact that they got pregnant out of wedlock? Yes, we already know it is morally reprehensible. It happened, it was in the past, get over it, move on.
But now there is a child, a human being, to take care of. We are as a conglomerate, interconnected, complex society. As such, we all have a duty to pitch in. We all have a sworn duty, incumbent upon us as human beings, to make sure the child grows up into a good, decent kind human being who actively participates and contributes to society.
It takes a village to raise a child. We are not simply "members" of this village. Monikering us "members" makes it sound as though the "village" is a disconnected entity entirely separate from ourselves. We human beings ARE the foundation, heart, and spirit, of the village. We are the village.
As people of the human race, we are a society that is connected to each other.
Another one-- they were wild, they had piercings nn crap back then. But they want to improve and mend their lives now. they have seen [[the error of their ways]]]
I have offered criticism of the recent remake movie Charlie's angels and the accompanying Beyonce song. Perhaps I was too critical of specifics and I should have focused more on the positive cultural affects. I feel I should atone for my harshness therein.
Drew Barrymore. I remember back in the 90s she was an absolute mess, with more entries on her social and personal rap sheet than a career criminal has of violence. But she has now evolved into a lovely human being, and dare I say, a notable colleague in feminism and praiseworthy professional.
I remember the first instance of when I saw a spark of humanity and decency from her. There was a PSA of sorts on TV, a very creative one. She was encouraging young women to vote. As a way of getting people's attention, obviously she didn't just do that spur-of-the-moment in real time as they were filming the commercial, she burned a bra in closing the commercial. The writers, producers, etc. had the really cool idea to hearken back to the greats, the founding mothers of this country. Chances are, Drew Barrymore herself was one of the producers of the commercial, seeing as to the fact that she was one of the producers of the recent Charlie's Angels.
Actually, no. The first time I saw drew Barrymore and was very pleasantly surprised that she had turned over a new leaf-- was the "Never Been Kissed" movie. It was adorable and cute and moral and hilarious and fun. She was innocent but intelligent, a nuance that is lost on far too many people regarding situations in real life.
So it is very possible for someone to turn their life around and make sure that right here, right now, from this moment on forward, they will make the right decisions and make a healthy life for themselves.
So instead of worrying about what they did in their past lives, how they conducted themselves in the past, let us focus on planning for the future.
Let us focus our energies on the future tense.
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