Saturday, July 3, 2004

Practical Arguments Against Moving In Together Before Marriage

There are many of them.

Haven’t you read any financial magazines?  Financial advice articles on msn.com or anywhere?  They all say the same thing -- get a complete credit check on your future to-be before even thinking about getting hitched.  Doing that would have revealed any and all financial hiccups in this person's past.  Gambling addictions, secret illegitimate children they are court-mandated to support, everything.

Do a full criminal background check.  In all fifty states.  And any international overseas criminal background checks.

Also any behavioral medical background.  Drug addictions, al anon, venereal diseases, abortions.

Sorry, but you have no right to huff and puff and get mad that that is all too nosy/busybody/none-of-your-damn-business/etc.  You’re getting married and/or moving in together.  The female has a right to know about everything.  And the male has a right to know about everything as well.

This should not be considered overly intrusive.  On the contrary, this should be considered just intrusive enough.  I mean, you're considering moving in with this person, for god's sake.  To even consider doing that, don't you want to first make sure this person is not a carjacker with AIDS?

It should really be common sense in this day and age, get full bloodwork done on each other.  All HIV, all hepatitis, all Chlamydia.  All what else, what else, that human papilloma virus that is apparently making the rounds nowadays.  Anything and everything.  This should be the case before you two even start having sex, whether you plan to get married or not.

Hey, look I'm not being hypocritical when I suggest all this background checking stuff.  When I get married, I will give my husband full disclosure and access to my background.  I will allow him to completely run the gamut of any and all background checks he wants to perform on me.  I have no problem being completely honest.  I'm an open book with the person I marry.  In return, I fully expect the same cooperation from him.  I'm talking family history of any murderous tendencies, bank statements to see if he ever owed any bookies money, everything.

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