Now that I have pondered upon it a little more, I’ve discovered yet another nugget [[[morsel]]] reason that I prefer to study science. That there is another reason I do not want to *study* the creative pursuits, and most certainly why I do not want to enter any of them as a profession.
I like Biochem enough that I would be engaged and interested while at work. But it is not my sole source of enjoyment in life. It is intriguing, fascinating, sure. It provides endless source [[[fount]]] of wonder, it satiates my curiosity, it feeds my drive to discover and learn, all that good stuff. I study it so that I may unlock the secrets of the universe. Arcane, long-hidden enigmae.
But it is not what I pour myself in, to relax in my spare time. I do not grab a cup of tea, curl up on the couch, and read over my Biochem lab notes. Wait, actually I do, but that is an essay for another day.
So I most definitely do enjoy Biochem as an academic subject, As a research topic of interest. But here is the thing. I am not so emotionally invested in it that I would ever be concerned that I would grow to resent it for mutating my fun, escapist hobby -> into a professional obligation. I wish to keep it as a way to just relax, daydream, let my imagination run away wild with me, all that good stuff.
I would not grow to dread studying it for making me feel obligated for feeling dutiful, like I made a commitment and now, grumble grumble, I made a pact/contract/etc. and I have to stick to it. Like I have a responsibility, like I made a commitment, like I will disappoint people if I don’t follow through.
I would not think to myself, “Oh woe is me, oh wherefore didst I ever studyeth Biochemistry? Gentle vial, relieve me of my misery.” None of that crap. I readily accept Biochem as the type of subject that is sometimes boring yet mandatory. Remember how when we were little, adults would tell us, “don’t expect to be enthralled in life at all times”? Biochem is sometimes one of these non-enthralling things.
Whereas for me art exists purely for entertainment purposes. Art is there to help me relax and unwind at the end of a long day at work and school.
I do not want to embroil myself in schedules, deadlines, meetings, or any some such nose-to-the-grindstone stuff. Not when it comes to writing or painting. I draw the line there. I do not want to engage myself in Work mode within facets of my life that are meant for relaxation. The purpose I engage in art and writing at all is that it is a creative outlet. It is a way to blow off steam, to air my grievances and frustrations. The way I see it, those are fun distractions, abstract interests, anyway.
It is not something that I see as any sort of drive to have focus, like something that I would approach with ambition. As in, I would not gather a list of references. I would not compile a meticulously detailed roster of skill sets, training, education that I use in resume cover letters into a written resume. I would not have a painstaking dossier of accomplishments that I would skillfully craft into curriculum vitae.
__For the express purpose of NOTTT working.__
I like Biochem enough that I would be engaged and interested while at work. But it is not my sole source of enjoyment in life. It is intriguing, fascinating, sure. It provides endless source [[[fount]]] of wonder, it satiates my curiosity, it feeds my drive to discover and learn, all that good stuff. I study it so that I may unlock the secrets of the universe. Arcane, long-hidden enigmae.
But it is not what I pour myself in, to relax in my spare time. I do not grab a cup of tea, curl up on the couch, and read over my Biochem lab notes. Wait, actually I do, but that is an essay for another day.
So I most definitely do enjoy Biochem as an academic subject, As a research topic of interest. But here is the thing. I am not so emotionally invested in it that I would ever be concerned that I would grow to resent it for mutating my fun, escapist hobby -> into a professional obligation. I wish to keep it as a way to just relax, daydream, let my imagination run away wild with me, all that good stuff.
I would not grow to dread studying it for making me feel obligated for feeling dutiful, like I made a commitment and now, grumble grumble, I made a pact/contract/etc. and I have to stick to it. Like I have a responsibility, like I made a commitment, like I will disappoint people if I don’t follow through.
I would not think to myself, “Oh woe is me, oh wherefore didst I ever studyeth Biochemistry? Gentle vial, relieve me of my misery.” None of that crap. I readily accept Biochem as the type of subject that is sometimes boring yet mandatory. Remember how when we were little, adults would tell us, “don’t expect to be enthralled in life at all times”? Biochem is sometimes one of these non-enthralling things.
Whereas for me art exists purely for entertainment purposes. Art is there to help me relax and unwind at the end of a long day at work and school.
I do not want to embroil myself in schedules, deadlines, meetings, or any some such nose-to-the-grindstone stuff. Not when it comes to writing or painting. I draw the line there. I do not want to engage myself in Work mode within facets of my life that are meant for relaxation. The purpose I engage in art and writing at all is that it is a creative outlet. It is a way to blow off steam, to air my grievances and frustrations. The way I see it, those are fun distractions, abstract interests, anyway.
It is not something that I see as any sort of drive to have focus, like something that I would approach with ambition. As in, I would not gather a list of references. I would not compile a meticulously detailed roster of skill sets, training, education that I use in resume cover letters into a written resume. I would not have a painstaking dossier of accomplishments that I would skillfully craft into curriculum vitae.
__For the express purpose of NOTTT working.__
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