Saturday, June 25, 2005

Middle-Class White Males Try To Be Badass As Best They Know How

The notion of wanting to be badass has taken an absolute permeating stronghold on their middle-class psyches.  Like in those "Animorph" books, how yeerks are described as wrapping around an intended victim's brain, slithering into the crevices and gulleys, the gyri and sulci.

There are no direct physical gladiator competitions like those duels back in the 1700s.  They whiled away their childhoods and adolescences in suburbia with two-car garages, lawn sprinklers,__

There are not a whole lot of opportunities to prove their manly worthiness in a philosophy class.  No heroic feats of derring-do are demanded from them in their everyday workaday lives while sipping Starbucks.

There are only a few careers (freelancing, whatever)/dispositions/degenerate-members-of-society that are one hundred percent accepted and welcomed as being badass.  The act of playing video games and fantasy roles about them does not make one a badass.  It seems a lot of people think that certain video games are badass and whatnot.  Uh, no, they are not.  For god's sakes, it's just a freakin video game.  Playing it does not make a single person badass.  What, you think that playing grand theft auto made you badass?  Uh, no.  All you are doing is sitting in front of a TV screen and clicking a couple of buttons on a rectangular piece of plastic, while gathering adipose tissue.

If your profession in real life were being a ninja, only then you would be badass.  Playing splinter cell does not make one badass.  Being a stealth-trained mercenary assassin in covert ops in real life is badass.  And even again, the so-called badass video games all use well-known occupations for their badass-factor.

Actors that act in movies about spies and shit, who are addled with the syndrome of "i am not a secret agent nor a member of the armed forces but i play one on tv" ... are not badass.  They are actors that are supplied with stunt doubles, controlled situations on movie sets and soundstages, safety harnesses and safety nets, and all the f/x you can eat.  The one and only actor that is intrinsically badass is Sam muthaf*kin Jackson, but you probably already knew that.  (I myself am employed in none of the above professions, nor am I sam jackson, so I know for a fact I am not badass.)

But they do not <want> to be emasculated.  [[[They want to prove their masculinity.]]]  For their own peace of mind of some sort, they want their manly mettle to be reinforced and validated.  And we know that women are catching up to them and challenging their masculinity -- but NOT in a way that they like.  A <questioning> challenge is not the same thing as validation.

We have already established that they do not encounter any affirmations of their manhood.  So where do they turn to, to prove their masculinity?  To venues of entertainment.  That's right.  They might not feel very manly sipping a tall four-buck frappe latte.  But what if they are sipping a tall four-buck latte while typing on their laptops about how much they luurrrvvve the video game in which they violently dismembered all the female characters?  Now THAT is badass!

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